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The confessions of a daylong HouseHusband

  • JWB Post
  •  February 16, 2015

How long the water should be boiled before dissolving the tea leaves? This is a question that never came across my mind till now. It was just that I had never imagined in my wildest dreams that making a cup of tea is so much hard work.

It all started when on one Sunday morning after being reminded for the umpteenth time by Priya about me being a late riser, (11:30 in the morning is hardly late) I had said, ‘what do you know about the weekend? I am the one who has to work for six days a week unlike you who sits comfortably in the house.’

Now, I don’t know how I managed to amass enough courage to say those words but after uttering them, I knew that I was in big trouble. At first, I saw only anger in her eyes but then surprisingly she smiled. ‘So you think that housewives do nothing in terms of work?’ It’s not in my nature to back off (I have proved this statement countless times on the drinking table) and seriously how difficult it is to be a housewife? You don’t have to be the breadwinner and you also get to stay at home.

‘Yes definitely, after all what do you have to do except for cooking and other small household chores?’ I went on. And from there she came up with this plan of a bet where I would take up the role of a housewife for a day doing household chores and she would be going to my business to handle my business.

And I am paying like hell for my stupid statements now! Since morning I have changed the bed sheets, cut my hand trying to peel potatoes, burned the toasts and severely damaged the toaster with the whole time trying to find out about the seemingly universal question- Eating is so easy but why is cooking so difficult?

Oh wait! Why the washing machine is making a strange sound and is constantly jerking sideways. I remember that a long time ago I had heard Priya muttering something about putting clothes evenly in the machine. So I have messed up again!161830732house_husband

Uh oh..It’s been quite some time since I had left the tea water to boil!!! By the time I reach the oven and manage to control the overflowing and extremely hot water, I realize that if I had been a little bit late then the fire brigade would have some mighty work to do at my home.

Ok…now it seems to me that housewives actually tend do more work from home that what we do in our office in eight hours. I seriously cannot understand that how Priya manages to do all these household chores and also keeps the house in spotless order. My knee is aching, I have a cut on my right hand and  the last time I checked, the dal that I was cooking had taken a murky blackish colour (wasn’t it supposed to be yellow?).

But hey…all is not lost yet.  Since I am facing too many problems, I guess it is safe to say that Priya too is completely out of her comfort zone in my factory. A wicked grin lights up my face as I picture my wife feeling clueless sitting in front of countless pending files in my office. See I am not a hypocrite, so I am equally messy in my home as well as work! After all what a woman would know about running a business even for one day?

Just then, I heard the honking of a car horn near my door before the doorbell rang. I was surprised to see that it was Jitesh, my office boy. “Kya hua Jitesh?”

“Priya mam has sent me to get the accounts file for December last year from your drawer.” What???? I myself was searching for that file for the past two weeks because of a discrepancy in the financial books of my business but had no idea that where it was. In one day, Priya manages to check the accounts and to also trace the file???house-husband

In the evening as she enters the house, I can see that Priya has a triumphant smile on her face. As she slowly inspects the kitchen, bedroom and the half cooked meals, I get the feeling that the humiliation is going to start soon. So before she could begin, I start my rant. ‘OK Ok you win the bet and I take my words back…I agree that housewives have more to do at home than I probably have in my entire office. I have been working since the morning and can’t do anymore. There’s food in the kitchen though I won’t recommend it for being eaten. Now you can officially start teasing me.’

Her words gave me one of the biggest shocks of my life. ‘Umm..Let’s call Dominoes and get some pizza…’

 

– Deep Mukherjee

Columnist

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One thought on “The confessions of a daylong HouseHusband

  1. Pingback: Things The Modern Indian Man Doesn’t Mind Anymore About Women

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