What is required to make a marriage successful? Should the deciding factor be shared life goals, common interests, and passion, emotional and intellectual compatibility or Caste and Religion?

After meeting Kiran Kaur Fahad, I’ve realized there are still people who prioritize love over their caste and creed. Kiran Kaur, who writes for Rajasthan Patrika, met Mohammad Fahad, who is currently working at DNA , during their job at a national daily in Lucknow.

Kiran whose father was posted in the Army had spent her life in several parts of the country before finally settling in Jaipur. She gives the credit to her strength and success to her mother, who after Kiran’s father’s death single-handedly managed everything.

How did you fell for each other and decided to get married?

I used to work in a newspaper in Lucknow and that is where I met Fahad. He came to congratulate me for a fake engagement news that I had told my boss because I needed leaves. Honestly, I had never met Fahad ever before that day. My engagement news started spreading like a fire in the office. I told Fahad that it was false. This was after which we started meeting. In no time we became the bestest of friends but still “We were just friends!”

Once, during Diwali break, Fahad called me and asked when I would return to work. Also, meanwhile, we had been talking to each other about our parents getting hyper for the marriage. So when he called, I told him that I would be leaving the job soon.

After I returned to Lucknow, Fahad asked me to meet him after office. That day I had to work till 2:30 am. So I called him to apologize and I was happily surprised when he said he had been waiting for me.

*Awwwww*

Fahad proposed to me. I don’t know why but in no time I said yes!

But that hasty decision we took together had to face a lot of consequences after Fahad’s family came to know. They were not at all ready to marry their son to a girl of a different religion. He had to literally go through rigorous family counseling. But he is a man of his words and he had not changed his decision even once. Later when I returned to Jaipur, I met Fahad’s father twice and he agreed.

When I told my mother, she without even meeting Fahad once, agreed. You won’t believe that she trusted my choice so much that they met each other on the wedding day only. We both happily followed each other’s rituals and got married.

Everything went so well in our marriage with the constant support and coordination of both the families.

What was your most difficult phase in this relationship?

Our major fight started when we were searching for a rented accommodation in Jaipur. Fahad and I had searched for over 30 houses that kept refusing to rent out flats because we were Muslims. The most shocking experience was when we went to one house in Raja Park. We met a 10-year-old boy whose parents had asked him to show us the flat. While we were just about to enter, he asked my name, full name to be precise! I told him Kiran Kaur, to which he replied: “Acha hua aap Muslim nahi hai warna hum aapko ye ghar de nahi paate.”

Fahad held my hand and we left that place. We were so shocked to hear these words from the kid.

We were refused from so many properties, saying, “Aap Muslim hai aur Rajasthan me mushkil hota hai ghar dena. Aap Eid manayenge aur hum Diwali. Kuch mel nahi baith payega.”

So after struggling for days Fahad gave up. We found a flat but even that flat had to be registered under my name.

 

I got so irritated with the behavior of people in Jaipur, that out of my stubbornness I pledged to buy a house of my own. “Apna ghar hona ek junoon sa ho gaya tha mere liye.” I had to prove to those people who refused us on the basis of our religion how flourishing our relationship was. And thankfully last month we bought our own house!

On a much lighter note and to cheer her up I asked, What is your love song?

After thinking for a while, she started singing “Afreen Afreen…, and though I suck at singing I joined her! Hah!

What is your ideal off day plan?

I have a Green Kiran initiative where I give money plants to people. So on our off days, we get up early in the morning and go to Nahargarh and other places to collect bottles. This is how I intend to clean the environment and enhance greenery too. Fahad helps me a lot and it is because of him that I am being able to do all this. We also watch movies and experiment in the kitchen with dishes that we learn from youtube and cookery books!

Doesn’t it sound so perfect!

One crazy thing you wish to do with Fahad?

I want to wear my shorts and set out on a bike tour with Fahad to a place where I get to see the mountains, rivers, and experience snowfall too!

Kiran and her understanding with Fahad rubbished the theory of opposites attract. She told me, “Fahad and I are so similar that most of the times we are thinking the same way, reading the same articles and discussing the same points too. Our choices, decisions and thought are extremely similar and relatable.”