Everyone has that one aunty/chachi/mami that has no other business but to drill her nose into yours.

Beta, aage kya karoge? Beta, shadi kab kar rahe ho? Beta, bachha kab plan kar rahe ho? Beta, log kya kahenge?

This unwelcome intrusion becomes too much to manage when you’re a girl; especially more so, when you’re a dark-skinned girl. Why? Because the nosy aunties get all the more meddlesome by stating that dark-skinned girls don’t get rishtas. They assume the role of almighty and declare the dusky girls as unmarriageable.

Well, dear aunties, a girl named Ayesha Khurram has something to say to you. And while you’re at reading it, please do keep in mind that it is not just Ayesha, but the whole of woman fraternity saying it to you. Okay? And we don’t want to keep repeating ourselves. Okay?

Open Letter To the Aunty Who Told Me Kaali Girls Don’t Get Rishtas

I should be apologetic. For what? Apologetic for the way my skin glistens in the sun, in shades of bronze and golden (I don’t need a halo to shine)? Apologetic, for the way golden eye shadow compliments my skin and my eyes, the way it rests on my eyelids, so proud and prominent? Apologetic, for the way my skin looks good with literally any colour – from the lightest white to the darkest black – because my brown is beautiful? Apologetic, for the way I am completely, wholly, unapologetic for the wonders of my skin colour?

Because brown is the colour of chocolate, and most people prefer brown to white? Because no, my skin is not as white as the star and the moon in our flag, but as brown as the stick that holds it up? Because I’m brown, and I can pull off red lipstick better than you? Because my brown is the colour of coins and gold and trees, because the sun loves my brown, because I love my brown?

Aunty, I’m not worried about marriage, at least, not right now. I’m not worried about a man, so full of himself and his white skin, or his ‘manliness’, to see the beautiful in my brown. I see the beautiful in my kaali. I see the natural contour, the tan I never need to work on. I see, a kaali woman, strong, bold, and beautiful. I see a kaali woman facing the day despite the constant hateful comments – it’s bad enough being dark skinned. It’s worse if you’re dark skinned, and a woman.

And so, farewell to you, fairness creams, powders, skin tone lightening techniques, desi aunties commenting on brides and their skin tone- I am in love with my brown skin. I am in love with my kaala, non-rishta material face.

If Kaali is a disease for you, I can wipe it off with a cream. Your mentality, on the other hand – what’s your cure?

Sincerely,

The One You Probably Forgot, But I Didn’t Forget You.

I guess you might wanna look for some other business now. Since poking nose in other’s is not an option. Not anymore.